Elena Agafonova

​ Coach | Author | Happiness Explorer 🌱 ​

Letters of Change A weekly space for happiness, self-trust & the art of living well ​ Let’s begin gently

Hello and welcome, Reader!

This past week, I offered around 20 pro bono coaching sessions.

I do this every year at the beginning of January—quietly, without big promotion —as a form of service to the world.
For people who carry real pressure, real responsibility, and often don’t have access to support when they need it most.

Different countries.
Different professions.
Very different life stories.

And yet, the same themes kept returning.

Today, I want to share what I observed and what helped.

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1. When Work Becomes a Dead End

Many people came with the same painful sentence:

“I’m working hard, but it’s not enough.”

Behind it were heavy realities:

• caring for aging or ill parents
• raising children with special needs
• loans, obligations that can’t be paused
• deep exhaustion, bordering on burnout

Most already knew the truth:

The real question wasn’t whether to change,
but how to begin without risking everything?

What helped here was not motivation or courage speeches.​
It was clarity of values, followed by very small, low-risk experiments.

We treated the desired direction like a personal startup:

• no investment
• no dramatic leap
• just ideas tested gently, step by step.

First, a Values Check-In, which is the starting point at all my Next Chapter Journey Tracks.​
Then HADI-style testing:

H — Hypothesis: What is my idea, really? What do I believe could work or bring change?
​A — Action: What is one small, no-cost action I can take in the next 2–3 weeks to test it?
​D — Data: What signals, reactions, or results can I observe?
​I — Interpretation: How will I read this data, and decide whether to continue, adjust, or test a new hypothesis?

This way, change doesn’t start with sacrifice or risk.
It starts with permission to choose and with learning.

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2. The Silent Burnout Nobody Sees

Another group didn’t look “in crisis” at all.

On paper, everything was fine:

• stable work
• decent income
• respected roles

And yet inside:

• emptiness
• quiet sadness
• chronic fatigue
• health signals that couldn’t be ignored

They had several scenarios in mind, but felt stuck choosing.

Here, one simple practice brought relief almost immediately:
​Prioritize backwards.

Instead of asking, “What should I choose for the future?”​
We worked with the present moment.

The practice is simple, but surprisingly revealing.

First, make a list of all real alternatives you’re considering.
Not ideal futures, but actual options.

Then, compare them two at a time: 1 to 2, 1 to 3, 1 to 4, etc.; then 2 to 3, 2 to 4, etc.

Ask:
“Which option feels like it would truly move me forward right now?”

--> Give that option 1 point.
Work through the list until each alternative has been compared with the others.

This process — called ranking — helps reveal what matters most in this season, not in theory.

For example (real case choices):​
– Train for a new certification
– Start a flipping business
– Relocate to another city

Many people are surprised by what rises to the top.

From there, clarity emerges naturally:
​ – what can wait
– what needs simplifying
– what deserves attention now

Not forever.
Just for this season.

Many of my coachees left with three small, realistic steps for just one option and a visible relief.

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3. When One Area Thrives, and Others Suffer

Some people genuinely loved their work.

But relationships were strained.
Rest was missing.
Learning, health, and self-care were postponed “until later.”

Here, we went beyond the classic life balance wheel.

The next step was values in action:

• What values live in the area that needs attention?
• How do people who honor these values think and act?
• What can they teach you—realistically, not ideally?

From this came a direction:
​clear lessons for the year ahead.

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What I Was Reminded Of 🧐

People don’t lack willpower.
They lack clarity that respects their reality.

And clarity doesn’t arrive as a lightning strike.
It grows when we look honestly at what is, without judgment.

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A Gentle Invitation 🫶

If you recognize yourself in any of these stories, you don’t have to figure everything out alone.

In my Next Chapter Journey Shop, you’ll find:

• books written with a deep understanding of the midlife crisis phenomenon and long years of professional coaching in this area;
• guided journals;
• practices that already helped many people like you;
• quizzes and self-paced courses.

All created to support clarity, values-based change, and gentle experimentation without pressure or self-betrayal.

​

Explore All Resourses

​

No urgency.
No promises of fast results.
Just tools to walk your own path more consciously.

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With love and respect for your reality,

Elena

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