Hello and welcome Reader!

Lately, I’ve been experiencing what I call phantom pain.

It travels around my body: my shoulder one day, my neck the next, sometimes my stomach. It’s not connected to injury or illness. It arrives silently and mysteriously, and always with the same message:

It often happens when I’ve slipped back into autopilot — pushing through fatigue, ignoring hunger, skipping movement or rest in the name of efficiency or responsibility. The pain isn’t punishing me. It’s simply pointing me home.

And isn’t this what so many of us do? We leave ourselves. Not in dramatic ways, but in tiny, accumulating absences where the mind spirals into stories, the calendar races ahead, the soul feels oddly... missing.

We say we’re stuck.
Or burned out.
Or waiting for clarity.

But often, we’ve just drifted too far from now.

The Gift Hidden in the Present

In English, there’s a beautiful wordplay:

We laugh a little when we hear it. But if you’ve ever truly landed in the present — even for a breath or two — you know it’s not just a cute phrase.

In the present, you are complete.
In the present, nothing is broken.
In the present, decisions are simpler, gentler, wiser.

But staying there isn’t always easy.

Why?

Because many of us have been trained not to trust the present moment. We've learned to replay the past for answers or fast-forward into the future for reassurance. We outsource our reality to what was or what might be. And when we do that long enough, we begin to forget who we are — right here, right now.

I’ve found that most people (including myself) lose presence for one of three reasons:

1. Feelings replace reality.​
   We stay in situations that hurt, because we’re more familiar with fear than possibility. Or we chase constant achievements, afraid to slow down. We confuse these intense feelings with truth. They’re not.
2. We forget who we really are.​
   Maybe no one ever helped us remember. Or maybe we buried it so long ago, under layers of "shoulds", roles, and identities, that we stopped asking.
3. We lack the tools to return.​
   Everyone tells us to “be present”. But how? Most of us were never taught. And sometimes the way back feels too quiet, too strange, too slow for our busy minds...

The truth is: you don’t need to fix your life to come home to it.
You just need to stop, breathe, look around, and.. embrace the gift of the present.​
It’s called present for a reason.

Checking In with Now

Here are a few practices that help me return to the present, especially when that phantom pain shows up:

1. Journaling. I’ve kept a paper journal for years. When I feel overwhelmed or disconnected, I grab a pen, set a date in the corner, and start writing — anything. It always begins messy. But as the pages fill, something clears. A quieter, wiser voice shows up — the one I’ve been missing.
2. Breath. Even in motion, the breath is there. I bring my attention to the tip of my nose and feel the cool air coming in, the warm air leaving. Two or three mindful breaths… and I’m back.
3. Meditation with the five elements. This is something I learned years ago from a Qi Gong teacher. Tuning into the subtle sounds and sensations of earth, water, fire, air, and space — within and around me — helps dissolve tension and restores a feeling of being deeply alive in the now.

These aren’t prescriptions. They’re invitations.

Your way back may look different. A walk. A favorite song. Talking to a tree. Whatever helps you feel rooted and whole in this moment — that’s your practice.

A Gentle Companion for Your Return

If you’d like a little support in reconnecting with yourself, I’ve brought together three of my favorite tools into a Gentle Change Bundle available now as a “pay what you want” download (yes, even for free):

• 🌱 Quiz: "What Kind of Change Are You Ready For?"
• 🧭 Values Check-In
• 📘 Companion Workbook for my newest book Embrace Change Gently

You’ll find them here on Gumroad.
And if they help you, I’d be so grateful for a short review 🙏🙏🙏.

🧡 Let’s Stay Present Together

Do you have a practice that helps you return to now?
Hit reply and share it with me!
​

And if you are thinking of a friend who may need it, forward this letter to them.

Being present isn’t about perfection.
It’s about coming back, again and again, with kindness and compassion.

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​

With love,
​Elena